1. You have rules like “No peeing on your brother in the bath tub.” 
2. You find a matchbox car when you reach into the bag of pita chips.
3. You distract your neighbor in conversation, so she doesn’t see your son peeing in her bushes
4. The smell of sweaty necks and stinky feet is oddly endearing.
5. You have to swing by Chick Filet for a snack on the way home from dinner.
6. You’ve actually spoken the words “New rule: you are not allowed to stick your pinky into the electric pencil sharpener”.
7. You have way too much fun watching your kids play with a whoopie cushion.
8. Whenever you sit on the potty, your tush gets wet.
9. Shooting squirrels with a nerf gun is an acceptable pastime.
10. You suggest Super Mario as a name for the pet bunny.
11. You tell a babysitter they read better when they are upside down.
12. The noise in the car is louder than your own thoughts.
13. When the house is perfectly quiet, you know something big is wrong.
14. You don’t ask about the bloody nose and scraped up knees when your son shows you his new trick on the scooter.
15. Laying on the floor is never relaxing because there is always fear you are about to be jumped upon. “Incoming!”
16. Your friends with just girls stare at you all with their mouths hanging open.
17. You find his reference to “the Force” in Star Wars a brilliant parallel to the power of God.
18. You don’t scream when your 4-year-old proudly shows you the Bb’s he drew…with the back of a hammer on your car door.
19. When you meet a little boy, you stick out your hand…for a high 5.
20. You have both a Lego and Star Wars font saved on your computer.
21. You can’t imagine the day he falls in love with another woman.

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